5 Surprising Ways To Feel Better Even If You're Tired

Hi, my friends. It’s Catherine from Small Steps Are Perfect and The 10 Minute Fix. Happy Canadian Thanksgiving! Happy Freedom Day, New South Wales — we’re out of lockdown on Monday! For everyone from every country, thank you for being here with me.

We have 83 days left in the year, which gives us so many chances to do and be all the things we might have been in 2021.

That’s 83 sunrises and 83 night walks.

83 fresh starts.

When I was writing Small Steps Are Perfect, I learned five surprising ways to feel better — no matter what was happening in my life. If you’re like me, we’re ALL tired of Covid and being steeped in the daily tea of negativity and bad news.

I was also struggling with some personal bad news and setbacks, and ugh, I needed these tips.

In case you’re not able to get my book just now, I wanted to share them with you here.

1. Failure can be a good thing. It can force us to get moving.

2. Choose who you let sit at the judges’ table in your life. Everyone has an opinion. Should it matter to you? You can choose.

3. Allow other people to be wrong about you. That’s it: just let them be wrong.

4. Try not to miss it twice. If you’ve made a commitment to try something new — writing your book, exercising, having a day of healthy eating — missing once is okay, but try not to miss it twice.

5. Sometimes a book can really help especially when we don’t want to share what’s happening. Like Beyonce with her Lemonade album (she turned lemons into lemonade), I wrote the book that I needed to read when I had a very hard year. That book is Small Steps Are Perfect. It cheered me on. It’ll cheer you on, too. It will also cheer on a friend who’s having a tough time.

Small steps are perfect. They really are. We have 83 days to enjoy, to live a little, to do the things we wanted to do in 2021.

Love, Catherine x

PS. You can find Small Steps Are Perfect here:

• in Australia.

• in Canada (selling out so fast!)

• in America

• in the UK

• in Germany

What I've Been Up To This Aussie Summer...

Hello, my friends!

Just dropping in to your inbox to say I hope you’re enjoying your weekend, and to let you know where I’ve been lately.

• I sincerely hope you and yours are doing okay. Oof! Life and Covid have been so very hard and I’m thinking of you…

• if you miss me, I send a little weekend newsletter every week at my new internet home, LoveOurAge.com

• The 10 Minute Fix: 100 simple ways to feel better now is making women around the world feel a little happier. You can get yours in America, in Canada, in Australia, in the UK and in Germany here. It’s a great price for gifting, too. I’m so proud of this little book, and so happy that it’s making women around the world feel better, one tiny practical step at a time.

Happy Sunday, and I hope you’re doing well.

Love, Catherine x

Hey, happy weekend!

Hello there!

Today is our 3 year blog anniversary — I hope you’ve loved getting a little happiness every week for 156 Sundays in a row, without fail (whew!). I appreciate ALL of you! Welcome to the new people, and thank you for reading!

This week, it’s time to celebrate. My birthday’s on Thursday and I love getting wiser! May is always a good month for me and I’m so glad it’s nearly here.

Because here’s the truth: April has been hard. Can you relate?

For me, a major project has finished up — my book is out in the world — and I need to figure out what’s next. I’m not sure where I’m headed with my new writing project. I’m not sleeping that well. I’m working a lot more now, too (one day a week in the city, some work from home, plus other freelance projects). And winter is coming…

I’ve found myself in a tailspin, overthinking everything, feeling stuck. Worrying.

So here’s what I learned this month thanks to my American friend, Kristen — and I thought it might help you, too.

When times are tough, Kristen told me, here’s the best question to ask ourselves:

When life hands you lemons, what is the gift?

When your kid is in pain, what is the gift?

When you’ve been disappointed, what is the gift?

When you’re worried about something, what is the gift?

I should tattoo this on my wrist. It’s such a great question. It’s helped me so much this month as I get myself back on track.

If you’re feeling a little down, if something has happened, if you have a deep worry that you haven’t shared with anyone, I hope it helps you, too. What is the gift inside your problem?

Enjoy your weekend, everyone. Have some fun — and be fun to live with!

Love Catherine x

• Picture book writers — did you know about this e-book? It covers everything I learned about writing picture books and getting a book deal for Jacaranda Snow .

• On sale today only for 50% off to celebrate my blog-anniversary! Learn more.

• Want to write your novel or nonfiction book? My online class starts this week, 1 May. Learn more.

How I'm Fixing My Posture (and you can, too...)

Hello!

This weekend, let’s talk about something you might need — a revamp of your posture.

Here I am, sitting in someone else’s bedroom, taking a selfie to show you my efforts at having better posture. If you know me in real life, you know that I have forward head posture…and finally, this year, I’m doing something about it.

I’ve been working on straightening up for about a month now, and let me tell you guys, it is HARD WORK but IT’S WORKING!!

So many of us struggle with hunching over (phones, computers, slouching) and I did a little research to figure out what helps. I’ve chosen a set of 3 easy exercises to do twice a day (plus weights to strengthen my back) and I’m noticing a big improvement. I’ll share the link with you below.

But first, let’s look at the WHY behind our posture.

Some of it is mechanical, and some of it is … you know … Life. I ignored my poor posture for a long time because it felt too hard to correct and, frankly, I was embarrassed. If I didn’t acknowledge it, it wasn’t there. Have you ever done this?

Anyway, confronting my posture and thinking about it made me remember that I started slouching when I had a couple of rough years in primary school. Over time, it became normal. When I stood tall, I felt like an imposter; when I slouched, I felt safe.

Hmmmm.

In January, I decided it was time to change. We all know that it’s good to let go of fear, stop hiding and stop playing small.

But there’s this:

So true.

No one tells you just how uncomfortable it is to stop being who you were … even when you’re letting go of something negative.

It should be so obvious to drop a bad habit, right?

Just let go of the stuff that’s holding you back! But the bad feels normal and comfortable. (The slouching, the over-drinking, the over-eating, the chocolate for comfort, the glass of wine, the bingeing on Netflix...the complaining, the criticising of other people, the angry outbursts, seeing the negative side of life.)

Here’s a really good question: what parts of ourselves should we let die?

For me, straightening up is a symbol of deciding to be on my own side. It’s about taking up space. My new posture felt so strange at first that I seriously thought people would notice and criticise me for standing tall! How weird is that? But ever so slowly, I’m learning to feel ‘right’ when I hold my head high.

I’m letting myself be seen.

Now, over to you!

I hope you have some time today to take a deep breath, give yourself space, and think about a habit you’re ready to let go of…

Love Catherine x

PS.

• The posture video I use is here! (I’ve watched dozens and dozens of videos on forward head thrust, dowager’s hump and forward head posture — this one works for me! You’ll need a wall and 2 minutes, twice a day.)

• Exciting book news!! Love Lie Repeat is in Frankie magazine! Take a look at this gorgeousness…

The Cure For Everything

Do you ever feel rocky?

Slightly off-kilter, like this gorgeous but slightly crooked photo I took of St Mary's Cathedral?

That's been me lately. And I read something really helpful this week that I want to share with you. (I hope you won't be put off because there's swearing, but bear with me. This works.)

This is the cure for everything:

Feeling worried? Take a deep breath ... and remember who you are.

Feeling sad? Take a deep breath ... and remember who you are.

Insecure? Take a deep breath ... and remember who you are.

Feeling too old? Too unskilled? Too late? Too judged? Too much for people? Too weak? Too sick? Too different? Too marginalised? Too unheard? Too afraid?

Take a deep breath ... and remember who you are.

And I will do the same. 

If we believe in our own authenticity, and relate heart to heart, we are never too ANYTHING. We're actually everything we need.

We've got this. (No matter what it is.)

Enjoy your weekend, everyone! Have some fun, and be fun to live with!

Love Catherine

PS.

• Welcome, new people! I appreciate you for signing up. More happiness for us all!

• One of my writing students is working on a project that could be as big as the next Stephanie Meyer Twilight series (but no vampires!). She's a total beginner with a hot idea. If you're a beginner and want to WRITE YOUR BOOK THIS YEAR, learn more here. I can teach you how.

• If you're new and don't know what I look like, here's me wanting to be crazy on some steps at Circular Quay in Sydney. You guys, I seriously wanted to run up and down, and possibly try a dance routine from Chicago. (Just letting you see the real me. And no, I can't dance. Yet...)

On Losing Someone You Love...

Two months ago, I lost my brother. I shared my story with a sweet friend who also lost hers, and she pulled up the sleeve of her sweater to show me a delicate tattoo. It was a dragonfly she got when her brother died. 

"I wanted to carry him," she said, and traced it with her finger.

Her words made me want to cry because -- truly -- I wasn't that strong or noble. I wanted my big brother to carry me. We were fourteen years apart in age, and what I wanted more than anything was the feeling of a brother who protected. Who took care of, like in the movies. Someone to watch over me and be a champion...but my brother was mostly gone by the time I was old enough to know him. Now he's truly gone.

Losing him makes me think of all the opportunities we give up to reconnect with people we love. Whether it's age or geography, differences of opinion, lack of time, or personalities that just don't fit, there really is so little point in staying disconnected.

This life is fleeting. Dragonflies barely weigh as much as a dime.

We all need to carry each other....and be gentle with each other's gossamer wings and fragile hearts.

If I know anything, it's this: we're all breakable, delicate, and sometimes tired. Every single one of us.

You.

Also me.

Sending love to all of you today, all around the world. Let's take care of each other while we can.

Catherine x

PS.

• A favourite song of our late brother, sung by Cat Stevens...beautiful. Rest in peace, James Greer. Your siblings honour you, from youngest to now-oldest.
• Also this: rest in peace, Aretha Franklin. Your work in this world was bigger than huge. Thank you.

An Unexpected Truth...

Hi friends! 

This week, I sat in my closet on a pile of towels and talked to a fabulous podcaster from America, Colleen Kavanaugh at The After Life.

Why my closet? There are no barking dogs in there.

Anyway, I learned something surprising about myself: I'm not scared of being older. And I don't think we have to worry about it, as if it's some kind of problem. In fact, Classic Age can be the very best time of our lives.

Colleen and I talk about the juicy stuff:

• why we feel pressure to appear younger than we are
• big mistakes we've made
• learning to age well
• going grey
• why NOW is your time

You can listen here for some weekend inspiration...

I'd love to hear your thoughts on becoming fully yourself at 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, and 80+. Email me! Or comment on my website.

Happy weekend! Have some fun, and be fun to live with.

Love Catherine x

PS.

• Adventure Gum Game -- mamas of Littles, this is April Hoss's idea (via this lovely photographer on Instagram): give your child a list of items to find AND a piece of Adventure Gum when they set off. Apparently the Adventure Gum makes it off-the-charts exciting! I'm thinking...can I have my own version of the Adventure Gum game? Writing Gum? Laundry Gum? I-Have-To-Go-To-Fitness-Gum? Love it!
• Overseas friends: want to see an Aussie sheep station? A boarding student at my son's school made this video of his family property. Oh so sad; there's a drought in NSW. Watch here.
• Happiness every weekend? Yes, sign up here!

Why I Went Grey at 49

Of all the questions I get asked, this one's the most common: why did you let your hair go grey?

Let me start with a HUGE disclaimer: please understand, this is about me and my life and my choices. It's not a value judgement or a sneaky way of implying that you should do this, too! 

Here's why I stopped colouring my hair and embraced my ageing.

Except for my friend, Pam, and my sister-in-law Christine, I'm the only woman I know who has gone grey by 50. Keep in mind that I know hundreds of women my age in Australia, America and Canada -- relatives, acquaintances and friends. I'm grey. They're not. I'm pretty much the only one!

When I decided to grow out my blonde hair, quite a few friends (lovingly, thoughtfully...) warned me, "Don't do it! It will age you!" And honestly, I think they're right. I think I do look older than my friends who colour their hair. But I also look good.

Older. But good.

Here's me before. (It's a weird photo because I'm hiding my braces! Yes, I got adult braces AND let my hair go grey all at the same time. Brave, right?)

And here's me After. (I'm three years older in this After photo...). It was taken about a month ago.

So why did I do it?

Authenticity.

I wanted to see what my (honest) 49 looked like. I also wanted to be free from dumping chemicals on my head every four weeks, free of the cost of hair colour, and free to reclaim the hours I spent covering up my grey roots. You know what I'm talking about. (Because, yes, the grey roots always show.)

I wanted to get my ageing over with.

I say this with relief: I'm done. I've aged. I'm grey. Now I get to head gracefully into the rest of my life.

So what's it like being grey? For me, it's this. (And please remember, I'm not judging anyone's hair choice!)

1. Surprisingly, I get more positive comments about my appearance than I've had since I was thirty. (I'm shy about this but it's true: strangers often stop me now and tell me I look beautiful. What a gift in the middle of my life! It makes me feel so good.)

2. A lot of compliments come from men and I never expected that. Being grey brings this strange freedom; now men of all ages 'read' me right. From young guys to those who are 50 and 70 and beyond, men treat me with respect. Young men know who I am: a 'classic age' woman secure in her own skin. I am 50+. I look 50+. I'm not trying to appear 35; I have the grey hair to prove it. 

3. Women ALL tell me the same thing. I've heard this literally hundreds of times: "But your hair is a beautiful colour. Mine would be awful." This one makes me smile...because every woman says this to me (and I'm pretty sure that, statistically, all these women would not have an 'awful' colour of grey hair! Who knows? Maybe yours is beautiful).

4. People think I colour my hair! There's irony for you: people ask me if I dye my hair silver. The answer is nope. This is me, naturally. (My Mum has beautiful pure white hair, so who knows? That might be me one day.)

5. Young women love that I've gone grey. They tell me I'm a role model, ageing authentically, and they hope they will do the same.

Here's me, three months in...growing out my grey!

Do I judge everyone who keeps colouring? No.

Do I think I'm smarter or more enlightened? No.

Does it make me look a little older? Probably yes.

Every person chooses his or her own path. For me, going grey was the best possible decision. I think I look better (and maybe a little older!) I've saved tons of money and time. 

If you're sitting on the fence about whether to go grey, i have lots of advice about how i did it (the short answer is that I did it slowly, without help from my hair stylist. I just grew out my roots over 18 months and enjoyed the authentic reveal of the Real Me. I wanted time to get used to myself.)

Whatever you decide to do, know this: you might be pleasantly surprised by who you are underneath your hair colour. Maybe. But that choice is 100% up to you.

Enjoy your weekend, everyone. Be fun to live with...grey, not grey, or somewhere in between!

Catherine x

PS.

• Hello, new readers! So happy you're here. (Please share my Happiness Blog with anyone who might enjoy it! Thank you!)
• My instagram photos are pretty! Check out the Canadian barn dance wedding. My new niece, Kaitlyn, was so beautiful!
• I'm deep into writing my next novel. If you're ready to write your book this year, I have a few spots left in my online course, How To Write Your Book This Year, kicking off 1 August. More info here!

Some Unexpected News...

Hello friends. (Welcome, new friends.)

I'm in Canberra at a book promotion conference for Jacaranda Snow. A sweet woman in the hotel snapped this photo of Luther and me last night, before we had dinner. And then, in the middle of the night I got a call from my sister and my Mum letting me know that my brother had passed on, unexpectedly.

We were six -- Jim was top and I am tail -- and now we're five.

So now: on a plane soon, and in my heart I'm already winging my way home to Canada and all the people I love.

Thanks in advance for your kindness. For you, this Sunday, a favourite poem:

Love, Catherine x

Secrets

Hello from the South Coast of Australia, where the seasons are crazy this year and it feels like summer one month into autumn. This weekend, we’re loving our favourite Aussie beach getaway. We’ve got lots of laughing, beach walks, late nights and family poker games going on.

Heaven!

So while I indulge in a family weekend away with two hilarious teenagers and my favourite man, I’m going to introduce you to my Canadian cousin, Jean. She’s smart, humble, relatable, successful and seriously pretty, but my favourite thing about Jean is her beautiful spirit. You can find her here, at her blog Unpickled.

Please let me say that I realise this post may not be for everyone – so if you’re not interested, that’s okay. Big hugs and I’ll see you next week!

Jean’s family to me – I love her! – and she’s also a fabulous human being. Recently she did an amazing interview about the secrets we carry.

I don’t carry the same secret as Jean did, but I’m pretty sure we all carry something.

Approval addiction. People pleasing. Anxiety or excessive worry. Shame. Trauma, pain, or difficult childhood experiences.

Jean’s secret life was like the secret life of a lot of people. Quietly, every day and with a surprising amount of control, she would over-drink in the middle of her hugely successful, stable and happy life. And then she found a way – online, in her own home, in her way – to stop. She’s lived alcohol-free for seven years now, and this is her story. (Click on the image or here!)

Why am I telling you?

Because I didn’t know about the sobriety movement that’s happening online. And since secret drinking is not my struggle, I had no idea there was support and help that was private, non-judgemental and didn’t involve public meetings or labels.

There’s a whole world of support inside our computers that doesn't mean standing up in an AA meeting in the local community hall. And it can work.

Jean’s story is so heartfelt, authentic and humble. She breaks down barriers and shows us how to support secret-keepers. It’s good to up-skill and learn what's out there. It’s good to be available for the people we love. And for ourselves.

Thank you for listening to my sweet cousin! And thank you for opening your heart and mind to all the crazy-beautiful things I share with you, every single week. I blog because I care.

Happy weekend, everyone. You're awesome, whether I know you or not.

Love Catherine x

PS. If a friend forwarded you this email, you can get your own weekly happiness post here. Lots of goodness, once a week.

Waratahs! How can Australia be so beautiful? 

Again, Jean's here at Unpickled (with a world of resources for people you love) and her story is here.

Playing Big and Playing Small

This week on The Practical Minimalists podcast I had a heart-to-heart with hosts Heather and Eryn. You'll love these two American women and their work. I promise! Click on the link above to check out their podcast. You can read about Heather and Eryn here and follow them here on Instagram.

We talked about playing big and playing small.

You guys, we'd need a world of coffees at my kitchen table to talk about this.

In your life and mine, why are so many people stuck on playing small? Where did it come from?

• Are we afraid of being criticised?

• Do we have imposter syndrome?

• Do women eat the lie that we should be small and quiet and agreeable? And not take up space?

On the podcast, we get real and honest about... 

• parenting fails

• hiding our light

• playing big

• starting where we are

• and JACARANDA SNOW, my new picture book about kids and flow and growth mindset.

Today I want to whisper in your ear what I said to Heather and Eryn, "We need you to be as big as possible. The world needs you to shine."

You can listen to our chat on the The Practical Minimalists podcast by clicking on this link, or you subscribe on iTunes. Heather and Eryn's show is about so much more than living a minimalist lifestyle! If you want a sneak peek of the writer-friend-vintage-collector I mention, Jules Van Mil, you can see her vintage jewellery here. Enjoy!

Love, Catherine x

P.S. The jacarandas are snowing in Sydney!! (Here's the story-behind-the-story!) For all you beautiful Canadians and Americans, this is a jacaranda tree. Sending big hugs to my talented photographer-friend, Doug Frost...and to all of you. 

<Photo credit: Douglas Frost photography>

Dear Unhappy Man (Who Crashed Our Girls' Lunch)

I'm sorry you were so unhappy when you rocked up to our table to say hello.

I'm sorry that you hate Instagram (because it's fake) and Millennials (because they check their phones so much) and probably even ME (because I am a happiness blogger and a fiction writer and an unashamed believer that Life Should Be Fun.)

I know we don't see eye to eye.

I know you wanted me to change my mind, and be incensed and denounce Instagram and dislike everyone under the age of 35.

But I don't.

All I did was remove myself as fast as politely possible from your company. Because here's the deal: we don't all like the same things, or live the same way, or want the same kind of life.

I want happiness and joy, so I spend my time (my life) seeking happiness and joy. 

I'm not sure what you want. Righteous anger? Less technology? Different millennials? Maybe what you really want is for everyone else to think like you.

I went away from you...happy! You stayed at that cafe table and were...angry!

That's perfectly fine. We both have the choice to see our world however we want.

Maybe I'm not right. Maybe you're not. As I love to remind myself (almost daily), "Catherine, you are not for everyone.” It's a lesson that takes a lot of maturity and wisdom to truly understand. 

The good news is this: we all find our tribe eventually...and I am a unicorn.

Choose your thoughts and create your world.

Sending hugs this weekend to everyone (even the grouchy guy!),

Catherine x

ps. I love Instagram -- to me, it's filled with our beauty and joy. Take a 'sticky beak' (Aussie rhyming slang for 'peek' at my beautiful, ordinary life here! I love seeing yours.

Talent

A story for you...

I saw this young construction worker at the Queen Victoria Building yesterday. (In Australia, they call themselves 'Tradies.') It was close to closing time, and he had come to one of the most beautiful, lavish, iconic buildings in Sydney to play this baby grand.

His drink from McDonald's (called 'Maccas' by all of us here) was plunked beside him; he had on heavy work boots and a construction jacket and he was playing the baby grand.

His music was stunning.

This young man has talent....of the real, heartbreaking kind.

I would have loved to hear his story: why he was there after work, whether he had a piano at home, how he'd learned to play so well.

Did he come every day?

Did his co-workers know about his gift?

But a group of teenagers came up and asked him to shove off. They told him they wanted a turn and proceeded to whack out a rendition of a thin and jazzy tune.

The tradie picked up his bag, took his Maccas' cup, and walked away. 

It made me think about talent: about who gets where and why. We only need to look at the explosion of beautiful photography brought on by iPhones to know that so many people have talent inside them. So many people are bringing beauty into the world.

So many people deserve to shine.

I believe beauty for its own sake is worth it -- whether we get recognised or not. The pianist-tradie may not get to play in a theatre like the State Theatre of New South Wales (below). He may always sneak in his daily practice on a baby grand in a glitzy shopping mall after work. But there he was, an encouragement to everyone: putting his beauty into the world.

Let's all do that, however and wherever we can.

Talent has its own way of getting out into the world, whether it's on a global stage or in a shopping centre, or even (quietly) in our own homes.

Have a beautiful weekend, everyone.

Be fun to live with!

Catherine x

ps. Want to hear the gorgeous Pianist Tradie? You can listen to him on my Instagram here or come to Sydney to the Queen Victoria Building...I bet he'll be there again. :)

The Lively Show

So. Much. Fun!

It was a big week -- that's why I'm sending you two blog posts (with love).

I had the chance to join podcaster Jess Lively on The Lively Show to talk about an online course Jess teaches, Flow With Intention Online. At it's heart, it's a class about optimism and flowing downstream rather than struggling up. (I've written about that idea here and here.)

Jess Lively is this amazing American world-traveller, podcaster and entrepreneur. She inspires and teaches, and she also generously donates funds to build schools for kids in developing countries with Pencils of Promise. She's interviewed so many of my heroes, like Liz Gilbert (author of Eat, Pray, Love and Big Magic) and Brene Brown (author of Daring Greatly). Jess is very expansive in her thinking -- she loves science and some out-there stuff -- and I love that she's all about helping people live with more joy.

Click here to listen to me talk about my new book deal & Jess' online class...fun-spiration from us to you!

Happy weekend, everyone. 

Catherine x

PS. There are also many, many other fabulous interviews with Jess and a range of lovely people, celebrities, thought leaders and entrepreneurs at jesslively.com.

Surrender

If the ideal day is like hand washing your delicates and hanging them on the line to dry in the sunshine, my day felt like whites and darks dumped together in a washing machine, then shoved in the dryer in lumpy tangles.

Life is not Pinterest Perfect.

And this is a problem for me because I loooooooove being in control.

Cue my Thanksgiving pumpkin pie. Here's the perfect picture I took for you a couple of weeks ago on Canadian Thanksgiving weekend. Delicious pureed pumpkin, steamed and mashed and mixed with spices. 

Are you thinking I'm a domestic goddess? That my floors are clean? Well, here's the reality of my kitchen bench top:

These photos remind me of the suit of armour we all sling on every morning. How are you? and I'm fine can cloak a myriad of worries. 

Meanwhile, time ticks on; small things go wrong or right.

Big things catch us by surprise.

I thought about surrender and control when I took Holly to the groomer this week. Shih Tzus don't shed, but their hair, like ours, just keeps growing. She's nervous in the car and trembled as I clipped her into her doggie seatbelt. Then I idled in the driveway for a while searching for a podcast, while she sat in the back shivering.

She had no idea where she was going (To the VET??? A haircut? What? WHAT?!?)

I glanced back. 

'Yeah, babe,' I said, 'I can relate.'

Sometimes I feel exactly like a dog in the backseat of a car, with my little dog mind desperately whipping around in circles. 

That's why I love this Julian of Norwich passage from a book she wrote in the 1300s. I guess it's kind of a prayer or a mantra. She was a mystic, and is believed to be the first English woman to write a book in the English language. Imagine it...she knew that only men write books.

And then she wrote one.

The image, if you look closely, is a bone ceiling.

It's a shot I took of Fiona Hall's sculpture 'Mrs. Macquarie's Folly' at The Royal Botanic Garden in Sydney. The ceiling represents animal bones. The spines represent Norfolk pines that colonists thought would make excellent timber masts for ships...but they were wrong. The knots in the wood caused natural structural weakness. The masts cracked. 

So much of colonisation didn't go exactly to plan, but here we are, still standing.

To me, that bone ceiling is heartbreakingly beautiful.

And there's a message in it.

Carry on.

The Gratitude Project: Yours & Mine

This sunset hovered over our house a few weeks ago. How is it possible that the world can be so routinely beautiful?

I need to notice it more.

I was talking about not noticing with my son's cello teacher. We went for dumplings to celebrate her birthday and she told me about a woman who takes one picture every day of something she's grateful for.

Have you heard of this? Isn't it a great idea? 

A Gratitude Project. A photo a day.

So being a joiner and an enthusiast, I started my own and here's what I snapped.

Australian Parrots

When I stepped outside yesterday, these girls were meeting for lunch IN MY GUTTER. Aussie parrots are gorgeous. And loud. And show-offy. Cockatoos (which always remind me of cranky chickens), Galahs (grey with a splash of pink, perfectly accessorised) and Rainbow Lorikeets...how can these be ordinary Australian birds?? 

The Granddaddy of all Milkshakes

Okay, let's just get it straight that I love a sweet celebration when somebody makes a sports team. How many grams of sugar? A bajillion. And the stuff that looks like blonde hair is not a wig; it's fairy floss. Can you tell from the face that he wasn't too sure about the HAIRY MILKSHAKE?? (From Vogue Cafe in Macquarie Centre...we shared, if that redeems my parenting a bit.)

I'm grateful for extras -- like celebration milkshakes.

Instant Art Everywhere

Remember the days when you forgot to take a camera with you to a friend's birthday or to school assembly? Now we roll guilt-free. Our cameras are as close as a phone. And we can make our shots look like paintings...

or even like they were taken by a pro. Everyone can take pretty photos now. I'm grateful that my phone makes it easy to remember beautiful things.

Ordinary Days

I snapped this photo in a retirement village when I was ready to give up at the end of a run. I was there because -- thank you thank you thank you -- the roads in retirement villages are flat as a pancake. Trust me, running in retirement villages is awesome. 

A gentleman drove by in a golf cart and said, 'Why are you taking a picture of that ordinary bush?' 

I said because I'm grateful...for ordinary things.

And it's a beautiful day.

---

<Big thanks to Trish, for sharing the Gratitude Project. Let me know if you start one of your own...I love to imagine you taking photos of your prairie sunset or Grand Coulee view.>

Puppy Love

My dog is perfect. She's like a little human being. I bathe her at least once a week; she doesn't shed and her hair grows and grows until it's cut and styled by Rebecca, our excellent groomer.

We named her Holly, after the holly trees in Victoria British Columbia, a city we love.

She cuddles on my lap in the morning when I have my coffee, and even though I know I shouldn't, sometimes I let her sleep on the end of our bed.

So when my brand new friend -- who just wrote this great book on managing fertility  -- invited me over for a puppy playdate with her 9-month old Maltese Shih Tzu, 'Happy,' I said yes!

My Shih Tzu, after all, is perfect. I thought perhaps Holly could teach Happy how to stop peeing inside her own house and how to use her new dog door.

You can guess this is only going in one direction...

When I arrived at the house, we made tea in the kitchen while Holly and Happy played inside, until my friend's preschooler announced (in one of those cute and loud preschool voices), 'There's DOG WEE on the FLOOR.' My friend said, 'Oh, Happy must have had another accident!'

'No,' the little boy said, 'it was HER DOG.'

Dead silence.

Um, yes, it was. For the first time ever, Holly peed on the floor.

In someone else's house.

Luckily, the floor was timber. So my friend ran around with paper towels wiping up while I put the dogs outside.

Done. Time for tea.

We sat together in new white armchairs in Claire's beautiful house, sipping from china cups, overlooking the dogs playing on the deck and the peaceful view of Garigal National Park through her massive windows. We talked, we laughed, we connected on a deep female level, as you do at morning tea. Until Holly hunched over and pooed on the deck.

Not on the grass. Not out of eyesight. Nope -- she pooed in front of the floor-to-ceiling window on the CLEAN DECK.

While we ran around grabbing dog bags and disinfectant -- and the dogs trotted nervously on the deck spreading dog poo -- my new friend kept saying (in her British accent) it's perfectly okay and it's absolutely fine. I think she meant it.

I have one important Greek word for myself. Hubris. Excessive pride.

It'll get you every time.

There is no take away lesson except this...

You love who you love, even if they poo on someone else's pristine deck.

<If you know someone who might benefit from an empowered perspective on fertility, please consider sharing Claire Hall's new book. You can find it in Australian bookstores and online worldwide...Claire's a fabulous life coach and a really lovely person....and, well, I owe her one. Obviously.>

Running and Laughing

For all you Canadians, this is a kookaburra, and yes, they do laugh. In fact, they laugh like crazy at 6am when my husband and I join our group-personal-training friends in the park.

Sydney winter is cold (think 6 degrees), sometimes wet, and definitely dark at 6am. We, along with all the other resilient, crazy people in our Step Into Life crew, meet up Monday-Wednesday-Friday at 6am to exercise.

Outside.

I don't know why I do this.

I'm not sure about your fitness journey, but mine has been 30 years of doing something -- not regularly, not perfectly -- but always something. I've done adult ballet classes, running, belly dance, tennis, zumba, more running, gym memberships, gym equipment in the garage, more running and now, for the last 18 months, a group fitness class in the park at 6am. And more running.

But working out is challenging, and the truth is this: I hate physical challenges. 

I know some people LOVE competition. It doesn't motivate me. 

So I've tried something new. I tell myself I'm 'Doing The Right Thing For Me.' I've always known that we're made to move our bodies and we have to keep moving them forever. So I've started to do fitness in a way that makes me happy. Not faster, or longer or in competition with a person or an app or even myself.

Nope. I'm just running and training for me.

Having those kookaburras laugh at us -- and laughing at ourselves -- at 6am with people I'd be happy to have around my dinner table works for me.

It's become our routine. We get up at 5:30am, get in the car, go to training and have a laugh. (Thanks, Steve and Simon!!)

The running side of this equation has been harder. I started (again!) because so many of my fitness friends run with grace and grit. Yes, it's hard for them, too -- imagine half-marathons, marathons and 7K lunchtime runs -- but they love it. And they inspired me.

But running is HARD (remember? I hate exercise that's hard?). Granted, I will do a million other hard things -- like write a book, make dinner 365 days a year, clean my own house, run a business, deal with the big scary problems that life hands us all -- but I hate doing hard exercise.

And yet, through my life, I keep circling back to running: slowly, irregularly, imperfectly. 

Have you seen this? I think it's Glennon Melton from Momastery:

Often I wonder why I don't give up on fitness. But somehow, I don't. I just keep getting back at it, running down my street again. I listen to music; I plan and plot my novels; I pretend I'm somewhere more fun (like at a party, not pounding the pavement).

Are you like me? Are you incredulous that that this fitness thing will NEVER stop?!

The need to move will go on as long as we breathe. Forever.

I reckon I might as well make it automatic. Decision-less. And have a laugh at the same time with people I like, if I can.

If Wishing Made It So

Hello from Queenscliff! We're lucky enough to be here while some work is being done on our house. 

Surfers, uber-fit mums, gorgeous sunsets and, according to our teenager, the best grilled chicken burgers on the planet...all on our doorstep. It's such a different vibe to life in the leafy North Shore! 

I'm loving nights like this:

And days exploring our new neighbourhood:

Australia, even your weedy laneways are enchanting.

If you take time to notice it, the world is so beautiful.

I've lived half my life in one country and half in another. I wish I could share both with you. I'd send my Canadian friends a beach and my Aussie friends a snowfall.

If only wishing made it so. :)

Wherever you are, I hope something wonderful happens to you today.